Something has been bothering you

For a week or two I have noticed that something has been bothering you. You are more clingy that you have ever been in your life and always just for me. It has been worrying me, and I have to say annoying me! I just put it down to the changes in your little three year old mind but I think in the car on the way home from Vuvu's tonight I finally figured out what it was.

In the car you asked to listen to your twinkle twinkle little star (not the regular version) it goes like this

http://www.haoting.com/htmusic/101281ht.htm (here is the link)

I looked round at you in your car seat and you were crying, big fat tears running down you face. I asked you what was wrong and you said "Oh, the little girl in the song is sooooo sad because her mummy isn't there with her." and I asked where you thought her mummy was and you said "She has gone away"

Then you stretched you little arms out to me and sobbed "Please mummy, don't go away and leave me all alone" OK so now I got it and I blame Disney! All the princesses in your life (and you consider yourself one) have no mummys! No mummy for Snow White, not for Rapunzel, nor for Cinderella and neither does the Little Mermaid!

So, there it is! You have figured out I am going to leave you and you have been scared to let me out of your sight for weeks!

How do I sort it?

Do It Myself

"I can do it myself" has been your favorite for a very long time, and today you proved it.

You had a pair of scissors and were cutting up loads of paper and making snow, then you came over to where i was sitting and said

"Look mummy I cut my hair myself"

"Arrrrgh" I cried

"I don't want to show you" you said, covering your forehead

"What about the back bits?" I said

"Oh, I tried mummy, but the long bits wouldn't work!" (phew)

Then you showed me the front of your hair proudly

You will always be cute darling, but this is not your best hair day!

A spring letter to you

Sweetheart

I often wonder when you got so big! You are three years old, 95 cms tall and 14 kilos. I barely remember those days when you couldn't walk and couldn't talk, the days when you didn't chose your own clothes in the morning, when food had to be soft and mushy, those days when you would run and I could keep up with you walking.

Yesterday, you stayed at Jo and baby Bella's' house while I went to get a haircut, when I got back Jo told me what a good girl you had been and how you had been helping baby Bella with her crawling. You were encouraging her to come towards you saying "That's it, come to Nana, sweetheart." "You can do it sweetheart" I wonder where you get that from, my little mirror!

I have started teaching in an awful kindergarten and everyday you come to school with me and are now my "little" teacher. You help the kids when they don't understand English and often take over telling stories and asking the questions. Its amusing how not only the other kids (who are all older than you ) and the Chinese teachers all just accept their English class from a three year old!

The other day one of the boys wouldn't put his toys away and you went over to him and said "Scott, I don't want to tell you again, put you toys away or we wont read a story!" then you turned to me with a very dramatic roll of your eyes and sighed "These kids are doing my head off!" I just crumbled onto the floor in giggles and you said "Mummy, it is not nice to laugh at people!" which of course just made me worse.

You often take over the teaching of the class, whether or not i want your help! I will be in the middle of teaching phonics and you will say "Ok kids, time for a story." then start reading whatever story book you fancy. Invariably the kids listen to you, and I have to struggle to get their attention back onto what we are meant to be doing!

You talk a lot about going back to Thailand, and how much you miss Gak and Steve, and how much you love Aunty El and little Lila, we did have such a great time. The beach of course was your favorite place, but you love Gaks house nearly as much.

You love everything about everything at the moment. If i say lets go to the supermarket you say "Oh I looooooove the supermarket!" and you do but you also love places you have never been before.


I love the way you still get some of your words mixed up or pronounce them badly. Its so cute! In the morning you like to sit in front of you little mirror and put on you pretend "lip dick" or sometimes it is your "lip spit" hehe, I do wonder whose child you are really because you don't seem very like me sometimes. When you see a butterfly you tell everyone that a baby butterfly is called a "caterpitter" Your favorite phrases at the moment are "It's a miracle!" and "Mummy, are you fwustrated?" and "Pay tension everybody"

You are struggling between growing up and being a baby. Some days you are so independent, you don't want anyone to help you with anything, and then on other days you ask to be called Tia (your baby name for yourself) and want everything done for you.

You told me how you want to eat more because you want to get bigger and bigger and bigger, then you can go to work and get money and we can all go to Granny and Grandads house. Oh my little darling, you are only three years old, you are not meant to know that Mummy and Daddy have money worries!

You still have the smallest bottom I have ever seen! So getting little pants to fit you is not easy, I bought some medium in Thailand when we were there to put away til they fitted you right but you found them and wanted to wear them the other day, so of course I let you. Later on we had to run down to do the trash and catch the lala truck and you were falling behind and said over my shoulder "Hurry up, we don't want to miss the lala truck" and you said "Wait mummy" i said "I cant wait darling or we will miss the truck" and you shouted "Mummy, just look at me" I turned around to look and you had pulled your dress up and your new pants were just below your knees and you said "I told you, mummy, these are too big!" I laughed so hard watching you trying to run with your pants falling down!

Well my little love, this letter has turned into a novel again and all I really wanted to say was how much I love you, and how much joy you bring me every day.

As always your silly billy mummy

beach babes

Sand is great but it is even better when shared with a new friend





















I dont think we need the umbrella up anymore




















Oh, this is so perfect.

Do you see the bikini that girl is wearing?

sorting out the world

Daddy came home today and told us that the Five Metal shop that we go to alot is going to close down. I asked him why. He told me that the landlords of the shop have put the rent up again and so the will close. I put my hands on my hips and started wagging my finger at the landlords saying

"Ok, you listen to me. I will eat lots and lots and get bigger and bigger then I will come and tell you. You open the shop ok? You listening or not? Open the door ok? No more bad man! Be good ok? See! I am getting bigger already! Look how big my bum bum is now!"

Daddy says I will be the President one day

Flower Princess

In December you were a flower girl for my friends wedding and of course you were great and loved it. I was worried at one point you were going to bolt, as half way down the aisle you stopped and looked up and saw every person in the church had their cameras pointed at you and were taking photos (photos to follow), with perfect princess grace you put your head down and started throwing your flowers again.

After the ceremony you back into the church and picked up every single petal and put them back in your basket. You went right to the back of the church and walked down the aisle again throwing all your petals again! Three times in total!

So last Friday night as we lay in bed you said to me
"Mummy, tomorrow we are going to a party."
"Oh, are we really?" i asked
"Yes, mummy a wedding party, and i will wear my dancing dress and be a flower princess again."
"But darling i don't know anyone getting married"
"That's ok, we will go to the church and wait ok?"

So if you know of anyone getting married please let the professional "flower princess" know, she comes with her own flowers and has a dress to match any color scheme.

Snow

You are fascinated by the idea of snow just now, you have watched it on TV and heard me talk about it but of course you haven't seen it. One day recently in Cheng Ching lake park, we were standing under a tree covered in pale yellow blossoms as the wind started to blow we were enveloped in the petals. You looked up, eyes wide and said "oooooohhhhh its snowing and its not cold mummy"

Then today you told me "mummy tomorrow we are going to granny and grandads house."
"oh really?" i said
"yes cause they have snow there and i want to play in it."

i don't know if you do have snow, granny and grandad, but Tiana wants to be there with you.

your smile

walking to the shop last night the moon was just a little slither in the sky, and you looked up and said "look mummy, its a smile in the sky"
and i said "yes, it is"
then you looked some more and said "its my smile, look my body is here and my face is in the sky and everybody can see my smile"

awww

another letter to you

Dear Tiana,

So much has happened these last few months, you are growing so fast, getting taller and even more (I didn't think it possible) talkative. We have had some sad times, some very happy times, lots of silly times and some confusing times.

You discovered this last week that you can reach certain chairs and toilets with your bumbum, so you have been telling and showing everyone you come in contact with that "Look, my bumbum is getting taller". This makes you feel so proud, you are able to climb up onto a lot of toilets all by yourself and then you don't fall off!

Being a big girl is a bitter sweet affair, getting bigger has it's advantages and disadvantages. You can ride your tricycle by yourself, you can pedal that little thing so fast around the running track at the school and so far you have only fallen off once.

We went to the night market in Fengshan the other day and after eating our Mongolian BBQ, you spotted these inflatable slides. The lady at the gate told you, you were too small and you argued saying your bumbum was bigger and you could do it. So seeing how determined you were she said you could try, if I went with you. So off you went, climbing and scrambling to the top of the smaller slide, you turned yourself around backwards and slid down, laughing all the way! Off you went again back to the top, so the lady took our money and let you play.

Of course, then you noticed the wall of death. An inflatable slide three storeys high! So steep it seemed vertical! I was sure you would be scared, I know I was and I was just looking at it. Were you scared? No, of course not. You couldn't get up the first step, so I helped you, and then whoooooosh off you went right to the top. I was watching you with my heart in my mouth, as you got smaller and smaller, and higher and higher, and further away from me. At the top a JieJie(big sister) wrapped you up in a hug and you slid down together, at the bottom you were so mad with her. You started shouting "I wanted to do it by myself" so off you went again, back to the top like a little monkey, turned yourself around, and slid down all the way yourself laughing.

The bitter side of growing up is hard for you. The other night in bed you said "Mummy, there is no milk in the boobie!" and I told you "That's because you are a big girl now" you went to sleep anyway. The next morning when you woke up you asked for a boobie(you haven't asked for a morning boobie in months) "Dont you love me boobie? Don't you want to give me some milk? Oh, mummy i am soooo sad now!" Later that day, you asked me "Mummy, can we go to the shop and buy something?" of course what do you want to buy? "I want to buy milk to pour pour pour into the boobie, then I can have milk in the boobie again!" Oh sweetheart I wanted to cry for you, so instead of buying milk when we got to the shop we bought you a pink camera as a big girl present. So all week you have been telling people you don't have boobie any more because you have a camera. You still want to suckle at bed time, but i am sure that will slowly decrease. So this chapter is finished. I am no longer a breast feeding mother.

Other sad things have happened, a man came and cut down the feral tree in the back garden, that our neighbour hated so much. When you saw it was gone you went outside and cuddled the tree stump and said through your tears "It's ok tree nana is here now, I will make you better." you gave the tree a big kiss and watered it with your tears and have gone back everyday with your watering-can to give the stump some water.

You make us laugh so much with you observations of the world. You stood up in the bath the other day and did a pee pee and said "Mummy look, my pee pee is kinda like a yellow fountain." We went down to the shop and met my friend Morwena, she was wearing a sparkly purple scarf, and you said "Santa gave me a scarf like that, mine is pink. I don't like it though."

You were in the bath singing:

Twinkle twinkle little star

I know I'm so beautiful

Daddy is so beautiful tooo

Mummy is mmmmmmmmm

Twinkle twinkle little star

I know I'm so beautiful

I guess it is time for me to start using that face cream, get a haircut, lose some weight and buy some new clothes! No one wants an old, ugly and fat mummy do they!

You have noticed that you look more like your daddy than you do your mummy. You keep putting your eyes on your daddys' eyes and saying "Look daddy, the same" I think your eyes are the most beautiful in the whole world darling, when they smile they light up a room, when they fill with tears no one can resist scooping you up and comforting you.

Well, my little darling, be sure I love you

Mummy

chrispmas

Ready and waiting for our friends, to start eating and unwrapping presents

Woooohooooo, look at my new dresses

I am a little fairy princess, with the emphasis on princess of course

Oh, time for a new dress, I have been wearing that old purple thing for ever!

I WILL open this present, that is why i have teeth

Mummy? Was there mucky beer in that cake?